24 June — Friday
Gabriela made me a surprise and got us tickets for the Wim Wenders talk in Curzon.
After the Q&A we spent an hour together in the bar area while having popcorn. Gabriela had sweet popcorn and I had salty, so Wim Wenders had a bit of hers and then a bit of mine. I have to say that it was a bit disgusting that he put his hand in our popcorns, but at least I have a nice memory.
We tried to talk a little bit about how bad the film industry is in general, but it just depressed me. I also told him about the interview I’ve made with his cinematographer Agnès Godard but he didn’t seem to care that much. He is 76 years old. They always say “Never meet your heroes”, which I don’t think is true. I think it should be “Meet your heroes, but don’t talk about heroism.”
7 June — Tuesday
A sequence from a test shoot I did for Yuyi
31 May — Tuesday
Today is my 31st birthday.
18 May — Wednesday
Today I had my visa extension application. I’ve submitted my documents and now will wait for about 6 months to get an answer. In the meantime, I’m not allowed to leave the UK.
The officer who received my documents at the application centre said that it’s great that I uploaded everything on the website, because the scanner doesn’t work properly. “We would have a lot of problems.”
She was also quite impressed with my fingerprints. “I’ve never seen anyone with fingerprints like this.” she said. “So precise, so perfect.”
I was quite proud. It’s true that I’m pretty good at giving fingerprints. I was told before, multiple times.
However, as she was looking at her screen, checking my fingerprints one last time, she noticed that I had a scar on my right middle finger. She took out a form, and told me we need to fill out the form and specify that I have a scar on my finger, and that it’s not perfect.
The form was straightforward. It already has all the fingers written out, as apparently this kind of imperfection was something very common.
But now she needed to scan the form.
14 May — Saturday
29 March — Tuesday
Today in a café, I was the last customer of one of the baristas.
She seemed very happy.
“Last customer, last customer, last customer!” she said to her colleague, pointing at me.
“It’s her last day today” said the colleague to another customer, “she is leaving”.
I started thinking if I should order something more interesting than what I usually order.
She was dancing. I would have a headache if I was that happy.
People were tall, single, extra hot and flat.
Soon it was my turn.
“You’re my last customer.”
she said.
So much pressure.
I asked for an espresso,
but a double espresso.
18 March — Friday
9 February — Wednesday
I’m on my way to Cardiff, Wales for a shoot. It will take about two hours to get there. The producer and I took the train from Paddington station. He is such a nice guy but not sure if he would be offended if I wrote his name here, and I don’t want to be awkward on the day we met talking about an online diary, so I’ll just keep the details for myself.
For lunch I had a pasta from Waitrose and a bar of Cadbury chocolate.
7 February — Monday
I spent the day at Kristina’s studio in Stoke Newington to shoot some photos for Inland. I had a backdrop to carry so her and Nico were very kind to pick me up from my house with the car they’ve rented for the month. It was a small but a nice car.
For lunch we wanted to order some potato pide but the pide place was closed — which we learned 40 minutes after ordering. Then we ended up ordering gözleme which actually was a better choice anyway. Mine had feta, Kristina’s had only spinach because she is vegan.
Lunch is by far the best meal of the day. The day doesn’t finish abruptly right afterwards like dinner, or it doesn’t show up out of nowhere when we’re still trying to wake up. It’s quite energetic, and if the day starts bad, you still have the whole afternoon to hope for better.
Here are some of the photos I took after having those gözlemes with Kristina.
4 February — Friday
3 February — Thursday
“Yeah life is definitely hard.
Crying is like my natural emotion
even if I’m happy.”
- The 10 year old kid at the bus stop
02.02.2022 — Wednesday
HERE IS A SHORT STORY
THAT I WROTE THE OTHER DAY
28 January — Friday
I’m on the bus, on my way to meet a close friend to watch Interstellar on BFI IMAX. We’ll also eat burgers before the film. He recently came back from Colombia, so probably has more stuff to tell than I do.
I’ve always wanted to see a film on IMAX, the one in Southbank is quite impressive. I like Interstellar too, especially the part where Matthew McConaughey says “Those are not mountains, they’re waves.”
The last time I watched a blockbuster film in a theater was with my dad in Istanbul, some months before Covid. We went to Solo (as in Star Wars) in the shopping mall close to our house. We hadn’t done something like that for a good 5 years or so. The sound system in the theater was pretty bad and it was too loud so I remember going out in the middle of the film and talking to someone from staff to take it down a little. I was worried that my dad would feel uncomfortable- he didn’t complain at all though. After the film we went to the food court to eat and talk. The whole conversation was maybe half an hour in total, but it was so refreshing. One of the happiest days of my life. That’s why Solo is one of my favorite films, even though I don’t remember a single frame.
***
The bus arrives and I get out to find Honest Burgers in Southbank. It’s kind of in a tough place actually—when I look at the map it’s almost as if I was standing on top of it but there was no burger place. You know in GTA sometimes you’re looking for something in the map and actually that thing is underground or above the ground or something, it was like that. Thanks to my PlayStation experience I manage to find the burger place, it was indeed on the second floor of a building.
I took some photos before going in. I’ll put them when they’re developed.
I sit and start waiting for my friend. Next to me there is a couple in their 60s both having burgers without talking. One of them has a napkin tucked in to his shirt. At some point the waiter comes and asks how their burgers are. The man looks back and says “good.” The waiter leaves, they continue to eat their burgers in silence.
I send a message to my dad.
26 January — Wednesday
I was on my way to meet Chloé, but there was a fire at the tube station (see the video), so I got an hour late.
Chloé is the founder of Marlow London. I’ll be shooting some portraits for them in the upcoming months which is pretty exciting. I went over to test the difference between 35mm and digital shots of her bags. It’s always inspiring to talk to her. We also had some delicious hummus.
24 January — Monday
In the afternoon my brother sent a photo of my niece and himself posing next to the snowman they made. It’s her first snowman. It was very nice to see them happy.
Apparently there was a lot of snow in Istanbul today. Many people shared stories playing snowball - some were stuck in highways. Later at night I saw that all the flights were cancelled. I feel more distant on these kind of days.
I’ve spent the evening watching Curb Your Enthusiasm with cereal. I’m on the 9th season. This guy really makes me happy.
I changed the bed sheets.
23 January — Sunday
I spent the morning in Caffè Nero on Upper St. I like it a lot there. The coffee is cheaper than most places and unlike the cool cafes in Islington it’s very easy going. I worked there until lunch and then ate a bacon sandwich from Pret, walking in Highbury Fields. Read a bit more about Jonas Mekas.
The rest of the day was just working on a presentation for a brand, for a possible collaboration.
Went to this café in the afternoon for a coffee, hoping the owner would say something about the potential work I was going to do for the café. She didn’t say anything - and I didn’t ask. It’s unfortunate that they are only open from Thursday to Sunday.
The best thing about today was finding some photos I took in Açores last summer.
22 January — Saturday
1
I spent the entire day re-cutting Céline. Some ideas worked but most didn’t. I guess I should move on and work on something new. Feel like everyone around me is sick of this film.
In the evening I went to Close-Up Cinema with some friends to see four shorts by Jonas Mekas (1) : Scenes From the Life of Andy Warhol (1990), Scenes From the Life of George Maciunas (1992), Happy Birthday to John (1996) and This Side of Paradise (1999). The first three were fascinating. Some parts are still playing in my head. What a privilege to see such beautiful work on a big screen. By the time it was the fourth film, I was exhausted so couldn’t really enjoy. I think Close-Up programmer made a mistake putting all these four shorts one after the other. I doubt if Jonas Mekas ever saw them like we did.
21 January — Friday
